Don’t be a Victim of Success

Who doesn’t like the sweat taste of success? We all aspire for succeeding in different walks of life like studies, career, sports, family or social life. Every now and then, we come across a successful outcome. Success makes us happy, lifts our spirits, boosts our confidence in our abilities, and motivates us to go further. At times anticipation of success drives us to give our 100% to a task. 

You may ask, “If success does so much good to us, can we ever be a victim of our own success?” The answer is yes. There is a fine dividing line beyond which the positive motivation of achievement turns into a compelling obsession. When we cross this line, we become a victim of our own success. We end up in a relentless chase of success, which eludes us. At this point, accomplishment ceases to be a source of joy. I have experienced this phenomenon many times in my own case, and I shudder to think about the damage it did. I would strongly recommend everyone to avoid crossing this line consciously, and if it does happen inadvertently, pull yourself back as soon as possible to minimize its negative impact on you. Look for the following symptoms that are a sure sign that you are chasing success as a victim:

• You measure achievement by external factors such as approval of others, number of likes on social network, examination grades, medal in a competition, etc.
• You are so strongly focused on chasing publicly visible accomplishment, that you are in a hurry to go ‘public’ with your work, and do not take time to refine it to the required degree.
• You start trying quick-fix methods to win, giving up the step-by-step approach, since it is ‘too slow’.
• You stop enjoying the journey, with the complete focus on the destination. Particularly, watch if your language has more words about winning and fewer words about trying.

The most recent example of the harmful impact of this phenomenon is the case of current government, who seem to have become a victim of its unprecedented success in multiple elections, followed by many successful decisions like 370 removal, resolution of Ram Janmbhumi issue, etc. They are now trying hard to replicate this success in handling of the strong opposition to CAA - NRC. Only time will tell how they emerge from this situation.

We can take a lesson from Aam Aadmi Party as well; after its unprecedented success in 2013 Delhi assembly elections, we  saw the damage they did to their cause by committing mistakes after mistakes in a desperate bid to repeat their performance in 2014 general elections. Possibly AAP would have managed to win more seats had they contested the general election as a new party, not worrying about their past success. Only recently they realized the importance of dedicating their efforts towards improvements in Delhi, not worrying about other states.

Let me take a few more examples to illustrate this point further.

• Take the example of an athlete who wins a gold medal in her first appearance at Olympics. She wishes to repeat the debut success in the next games, but fails in the qualifying round. The desperation to win again does not help her at all. In the extreme case, this chase of past glory may force her to try out unfair means like drugs.
• When a student who has managed good grades in college approaches a real world job as another examination, it is not likely to work. He may try to apply his tried and tested approach even more vigorously to replicate his achievement. Again the desperation to succeed does not help him in his goal at all.
• Imagine a budding music band that enjoys their music and comes out with song compositions at times. One of their songs goes viral on social network and becomes very popular. They become so motivated with this unexpected success that they want to replicate and even surpass it. The problem starts when the band shifts its focus from enjoying music to producing another super hit that eludes them. They are desperate to come out with another hit, but it does not yield the desired result.

In short, when you let your glory of past and worry of future ruin the happiness of present, you are a victim of your success. Now that we know how to recognize it, what can we do to avoid it or to break free from the destructive pattern?  Here are some ideas that has worked for me. I hope you will also find some of these useful.

One more Chance

First of all, give yourself one more chance to try and win. Maybe your failure was a temporary thing and you are all set to succeed if you try once more. But do not invest too much emotional stake in the outcome. Be prepared to accept it calmly if it does not work.

Let go

Do not keep holding your past achievements tightly, let go of it. It is time to forget everything about your past glory and start afresh. Your past accomplishments should become just a pleasant memory and it should not continue to keep influencing your present. If things go well, maybe you can repeat it, maybe not. It really doesn’t matter in the long run.

Action not Outcome

Do not worry too much about the results and stop relying on external measure for your success. Devise your own internal yardstick to determine how well you have done. Above all, enjoy the action and the process of doing it. Do not kill the joy of today by worrying about the outcome of tomorrow.

Principle of Farm

Remember the principle that a farm needs careful cultivation before it yields a good crop. Similarly, there are no shortcuts in life. Any significant achievement needs lots of preparation and careful development. Therefore, give up the quick fix approach and opt for sustained effort. A sincere effort may not bring you instant success, but it will go a long way to move you  in the right direction. Look objectively to find out if you need to do something differently. Be patient and give it the time that it deserves.

These are a few suggestions I have. You may find that some of your own ideas work better in your case. The most important point I want to stress again is that we must be able to recognize when we have become a victim of our own success, and should do everything possible to pull out of the dangerous situation.