Poetic Wisdom from Neeraj

Gopaldas Neeraj is my favorite Hindi poet, and I consider myself fortunate that I got the opportunity to hear him recite his poems in a Kavi Sammelan may years back.

Neeraj made a mark in Hindi film music by writing lyrics for many of the songs, but as a poet, he was never really excited by his film work, the literary creations used to give him more satisfaction.

I am a big fan of his landmark song - Karvan Guzar Gaya and have sung it as well.

Neeraj had a very distinct style of poetry. Hidden behind the simple and beautiful words of his poems, often there is deep meaning and wisdom. Here is my attempt to decipher some of his verses.

 

Get rid of excess baggage if you want to be happy. 

जितना कम सामान रहेगा 

उतना सफर आसान रहेगा 

जितनी भारी गठरी होगी 

उतना तू हैरान रहेगा

Learn to face a difficult situation as a challenge. 

जिस वक़्त जीना गैर मुमकिन सा लगे 

उस वक़्त जीना फर्ज़ है इंसान का 

लाज़िम लहर के साथ है तब खेलना 

ज़ब हो समन्दर पे नशा तूफान का

Don’t have any regret about past. 

जीवन कटना था, कट गया 

अच्छा कटा, बुरा कटा यह तुम जानो 

मैं तो यह समझाता हूँ 

कपडा पुराना एक फटना था, फट गया 

जीवन कटना था, कट गया

The irony of life – we don’t know ourselves. 

तमाम उम्र मैं एक अजनबी के घर मे रहा 

सफर न करते हुये भी किसी सफर मे रहा

Religion should preach humanity and brotherhood. 

अब तो मजहब कोइ ऎसा चलाया जाये 

जिसमे इंसान को इंसान बनाया जाये 

जिसकी खुशबू से महक जाये पडोसी का भी घर 

फूल इस किस्म का आँगन मे खिलाया जाये

Spare a thought for the underprivileged. 

जलाओ दिये पर रहे ध्यान इतना 

अंधेरा धरा पर कहीं रह न जाये

How romantic! 

जब चले जायेंगे लौट के सावन की तरह 

याद आयेंगे प्रथम प्यार के चुंबन की तरह 

ज़िक्र जिस दम भी छिडा उनकी गली मे मेरा 

जाने शर्माये वो क्यों गांव की दुल्हन की तरह

क्या Communication Gap है

अरविन्द और अनिल को बचपन से ही एक दूसरे की बात समझने मे बहुत कठिनाई होती है। बचपन में एक बार दोनो डाक्टर-मरीज़ खेल रहे थे, अनिल डाक्टर बना और अरविन्द मरीज बनकर उसके पास पहुँचा:

अनिल:  तबियत कैसी है?

अरविन्द:    पहले से ज्यादा खराब है।

अनिल:  दवाई खा ली थी?

अरविन्द:    खाली नहीं थी भरी हुई थी।

अनिल: मेरा मतलब है दवाई ले ली थी?

अरविन्द:    जी आप ही से तो ली थी।

अनिल:  अरे भाई! दवाई पी ली थी?

अरविन्द:    नहीं जी दवाई नीली थी।

अनिल: ओफ्फोह! दवाई को पी लिया था.?

अरविन्द:    नहीं जी पीलिया तो मुझे था।

अनिल: हूज़ूरे आला! दवाई को खोल के मुँह में रख लिया था?

अरविन्द:    नहीं आप ही ने तो कहा था कि फ्रिज में रखना।

अनिल: ज़नाब क्या मार खाने का इरादा है?

अरविन्द:   नहीं दवाई खानी है।

अनिल: मेहरबानी करके यहाँ से निकल जाईये।

अरविन्द:   जा रहा हूँ, फिर कब आऊँ?

अनिल: मरने के बाद।

अरविन्द:   आपके या मेरे?

Happy Father's Day

Today is Father's day. Here is a beautiful poem by Om Vyas Om (re-arranged a bit) to express my feelings on this occasion:

पिता अँगुली पकडे बच्चे का सहारा है,
पिता कभी कुछ खट्टा कभी खारा है,

पिता से ही बच्चों के ढेर सारे सपने हैं,
पिता है तो बाज़ार के सब खिलौने अपने हैं,

पिता…पिता अप्रदर्शित-अनंत प्यार है,
पिता है तो बच्चों को इंतज़ार है,

पिता…पिता जीवन है, सम्बल है, शक्ति है,
पिता…पिता सृष्टी मे निर्माण की अभिव्यक्ती है,

पिता…पिता पालन है, पोषण है, परिवार का अनुशासन है,
पिता…पिता धौंस से चलना वाला प्रेम का प्रशासन है,

पिता…पिता रोटी है, कपडा है, मकान है,
पिता…पिता छोटे से परिंदे का बडा आसमान है,

पिता से परिवार में प्रतिपल राग है,
पिता से ही माँ की बिंदी और सुहाग है,

पिता अपनी इच्छाओं का हनन और परिवार की पूर्ती है,
पिता…पिता रक्त निगले हुए संस्कारों की मूर्ती है,

पिता…पिता एक जीवन को जीवन का दान है,
पिता…पिता दुनिया दिखाने का एहसान है,

वो खुशनसीब हैं माँ-बाप जिनके साथ होते हैं,
क्योंकि माँ-बाप के आशिषों के हाथ हज़ारों हाथ होते हैं

प्रेरणा दायक विचार

अकसर लोग बेहतर की तलाश मे बेहतरीन खो देते हैं |

नीयत साफ और मकसद सही हो तो यकीनन किसी न किसी रूप में ईश्वर भी आपकी मदद करते हैं |

अच्छाई एक न एक दिन अपना असर जरूर दिखाती है |

हर नजर में मुमकिन नहीं है बेगुनाह रहना, वादा ये करें की खुद की नजर में बेदाग रहें |

हम जब किसी का अच्छा कर रहे होते हैं तो हमारे लिए भी कुछ अच्छा हो रहा होता है |

दुनिया में हर चीज ठोकर लगने से टूट जाती है, एक कामयाबी ही है जो ठोकर खाकर ही मिलती है |

माना कि आप किसी का भाग्य नहीं बदल सकते लेकिन अच्छी प्रेरणा और सही राय देकर किसी का मार्ग दर्शन तो कर सकते हैं |

किस्मत आपके हाथ में नहीं होती पर निर्णय आपके हाथ में होता है, आपका निर्णय आपकी किस्मत बदल सकता है |

रुमाल से आंसू पोंछे जा सकते हैं किंतु क्षमा और प्रेम आंसुओं के कारण को ही समाप्त कर देते हैं |

सेलो टेप हो या सम्बन्ध अंत में ऐसे न छोड़ देना, कि वापिस ढूंढ़ने के लिये खरोचना पड़े |

अपना दर्द सबको न बताएं क्योंकि सबके घर मरहम नहीं होता मगर नमक हर एक के घर होता है |

संबंध कभी भी सबसे जीतकर नहीं निभाए जा सकते |

जैसे हो वैसे ही रहिये क्योंकि original की कीमत Copy से अधिक होती हैं |

मुझे वो रिश्ते पसंद है जिनमें "मैं" नहीं "हम" हो |

समय जब निर्णय करता है तब गवाहों की जरूरत नहीं होती |

परेशानी हालात से नही, ख़यालात से पैदा होती है |

चिंता इतनी कीजिए की काम हो जाए, पर इतनी नही की जिंदगी तमाम हो जाए |

स्वभाव भी इंसान की अपनी कमाई हुयी सबसे बड़ी दौलत है |

तारीफ़ अपने आपकी करना फ़िज़ूल है, ख़ुशबू तो ख़ुद ही बता देती है, कौन सा फ़ूल है |

What They do not Teach You in School

Think about it, we spend a significant part of our life in formal education, nearly 16 years or more in school / college, which is expected to equip us with the required knowledge and skills to prepare us for life. We learn languages, mathematics, science, history, geography, etc in school, and in college we focus on career building skills such as engineering, commerce, medical, etc. There is no doubt that this education adds a significant value, and helps one to get a jump start in life. A major challenge in India today is that a large part of population is still deprived of this opportunity, and remains uneducated and illiterate.  

Another aspect to think about is the inadequate quality of our education. Students spend four years in an engineering college in order to acquire necessary skills to start as an engineer, but very often all they get is theoretical knowledge, and the practical skills required for the job are barely touched on the surface. Clearly, there is an urgent need to improve our college education in this direction. Most companies pitch in here with elaborate technical training programs for college graduates to prepare them for their job.

With so many years spent on education, it is expected that it will prepare us well for life in all aspects, which is far from the reality. Our curriculum has a single minded focus on job and career, and it works on the assumption that if you have a well-paying career or business and have enough money, you are going to be successful and happy in life. We discover from experience later that there are several other life skills that are needed to face life. These most vital life skills are largely ignored in our formal education, and our schools and colleges do not make any attempt to teach these competencies. If anything, they attempt to address them only indirectly, letting each student struggle on her own to develop these. Even at the job, these abilities are bundled under "soft-skills", and get minimal attention in employee education programs. This is one of the factors responsible for growing sense of unhappiness in youngsters who are immensely successful by conventional yardstick.

In this post, I discuss some of these abilities that are so vital for everyone that they deserve to be in our formal syllabus.

Self-Management

You are at the center of your universe, every outcome in your life depends on how you think and act. Hence it is natural that the most important life skill is about managing yourself. It ultimately decides how successful, happy, and satisfied you are going to be. You must have experienced days when you take right steps and get a lot of stuff done, and other days when you do not seem to find the right rhythm and struggle to take things forward. For example, look at these abilities that come into play in our day to day life, have you seen any course in school or college that deals with these topics? 

• How to manage your time effectively?
• How to handle stress and worries of everyday life?
• How to deal with failures / personal loss?
• How to make right decisions
• How to control our anger, envy, frustration, mood swings? 

Social behavior 

Next to managing yourselves, is managing your interaction with others. We come across people in every situation, at home, work, on road, in society. Why should we be left to ourselves to learn the inter-personal skills? How we get along with others can have a major impact on our life. For example, look at these social abilities that come into play in our day to day life. 

• How do we ensure positive interaction with others?
• How to work well in a team?
• How to communicate our thoughts to others?
• How to convince people about our ideas?
• How to be a good listener?
• How to take criticism from others?

Relationships

Humans have a need for having close meaningful relationships that provide a sense of love and belonging. But this is like a beautiful garden that has minefields all around. As you take a walk in it, you may enjoy sweet fragrance of flowers, taste of sweet fruits, but step on a mine by mistake and it may blow away everything. This is an area that certainly deserves to be given more direct attention in our education system.

• How do we form meaningful, long-lasting relationships with family, friends, and co-workers?
• How to sustain a relationship and keep it energized?
• What to do for damage control when things go wrong?
• How to reconcile the differences in a relationship?
• How to handle discussions, arguments, and conflicts?

Marriage

This fundamental aspect of human life is completely overlooked in our education. Ask any couple getting married – are they prepared for the life ahead? And the answer will be an eye opener for you. In some cases, people do more preparations for a short air travel than what they do for a journey that is going to last a lifetime. Somehow when it comes to marriage, we believe that things will take care of themselves. Little wonder that many youngsters find it a challenging endeavor, and marital discord is on the rise.

• How to choose the right life partner?
• How to develop a close bond with our partner and form a family?
• What to do to make a marriage successful?
• How to bring up kids?
• Signs to look for when things go wrong

Positive Attitude

The ultimate desire in life is to be happy, and it is influenced mostly by how we see our life and situation. It is so important that there should be a class in school from the very beginning to teach the art of positive thinking. Let us bring up a generation of positive thinking youngsters and we will equip them with the mental toughness required for the roller-coaster ride of life.

• How to develop control over our thoughts?
• How to grow a positive mindset?
• How to be happy in life?
• How to handle adversity with a positive approach?
• How to keep our belief and enthusiasm even when faced with hurdles?

How to Develop These Skills?

Educationists may wake up some day and include these topics in the curriculum. Possibly our kids may not have to struggle to learn them. But that consolation does not help you right now. How do you go about acquiring these skills now?

You would notice that through every day experiences, you have subconsciously attained a certain understanding and proficiency in these life skills, so you are not at the start line. You may also realize that improving your level in some of these areas can bring in big positive changes in your life.

Don’t just depend at hacking around, and and learning on the fly by doing what comes to your mind. Do take time to read and learn from others. Read good books, blogs, and articles on the subject. Take time to discuss it with friends, spouse, or kids. You have worked really hard to develop career skills, and the life skills need equally strong attention from you. 

Choose Your Career Wisely

This is the time of the year again when results of various board and competitive examinations are announced. You will find a constant din of sky-high percentages and ranks around you. Students who clear the exam with modest marks often feel disappointment instead of happiness of success. Even if you scored less than expected marks, do not despair; instead focus on plans and actions that will help you do well in future.

Relax

First and foremost, relax. This isn’t the end of the world. Before making any impulsive decision in a disturbed state of mind, it is important that you sit back and give rest to your mind. Look at the reality of the situation. Stop feeling bad about your results, since this is not the only exam you are going to take; nor are you the only student who scored such marks.

Understand Reality

As much as we all consider marks to be the final verdict of a student’s capability, it is not true. While good marks do play a role in giving a head start to your career, in the long run your success in career is not so much dependent on this head start. Take time to understand your strengths, aptitude, interests, and passion. You can visit a career counseller or take an aptitude test to find out career options that are most suitable for you.

Avoid Comparison

Students and their parents must not compare themselves to their peers, as this really hits your morale badly. Remember, you are a unique and valuable individual on your own, and performance of others should not be a benchmark for you. Always remember to compete with yourself, try doing better tomorrow than what you did today. Stop lingering on this exams, and concentrate your energies on constructively preparing for next test. Explore ways to improve your performance and act on them in a step by step manner. This would ensure a slow and steady growth, both professionally as well as personally.

Be Open to New Age Careers

Gone are the days when students had limited career opportunities to choose from. Today, there are several other career paths that are at par with traditional enginnering / medical / MBA degrees. Consider new skill-based courses in journalism, music, arts, dance, graphic design, ethical hacking, fashion designing, content writing, blogging, social media management, app development, film making, etc. Start researching on each of these to find out the possible career options and required skill-set for them, and make an informed choice in keeping with your aptitude and interests.
To conclude, always remind yourself that your marksheet does not determine your true worth. Use this as a motivation to do better next time. Stay strong and prepare for your future with a clear mind.