If you are an eligible bachelor, you can easily relate to it. It seems you cannot have an intelligent conversation with anyone in the family for thirty minutes without the other person popping the question, "so, when are you getting married?"
You are no doubt on the verge of getting fed up with so much noise (shor) about marriage. You know that marriage is on the cards, but you do not want to rush into it. You want to be careful about this decision and find the perfect person before you take the plunge. You may also have many related concerns, like the following:
If you got interested and are reading this post to find an answer, let us listen to this iconic song from the movie Shor together;
The meaningful words of this song may hold the key to your queries. Am I kidding? No, I am serious. This song tells you that it is not as complicated as you think, and mutual love can answer most of your concerns. Let me dissect it verse by verse to illustrate my point.
Relax. Take it Easy
Concern: Am I ready for marriage? How will I cope with the complexities and challenges of married life? Can I come up to the expectations from my spouse, family, and friends?
एक प्यार का नगमा है, मौजों की रवानी है
ज़िंदगी और कुछ भी नहीं, तेरी मेरी कहानी है
Life is a beautiful ode of love.. a flow of lovely waves.. It is only as complex as you decide to make it. Do not overburden yourself with the expectations imposed by others. It is your story, and the two of you choose what to write in it, simple.
Change is for Good
Concern: This will be a big change for me. I will be losing my independent bachelor life and the freedom associated with it. Will I be happy?
कुछ पाकर खोना है, कुछ खोकर पाना है
जीवन का मतलब तो आना और जाना है
दो पल के जीवन से, इक उम्र चुरानी है
ज़िंदगी और कुछ भी नहीं, तेरी मेरी कहानी है
Agreed, life changes after marriage and you lose your bachelor life, but look at the companionship that you get in return. A loving, caring and understanding partner for whole life. The joy that your kids give you, is something that is to be experienced; it cannot be described in words. So, the change that you undergo is for your own good.
The Perfect Couple
Concern: How do I look for a partner who is a perfect match for me? What if I discover later that the two of us are not compatible?
तू धार है नदिया की, मैं तेरा किनारा हूँ
तू मेरा सहारा है, मैं तेरा सहारा हूँ
आँखों में समंदर है, आशाओं का पानी है
ज़िंदगी और कुछ भी नहीं, तेरी मेरी कहानी है
It is not necessary that your partner must be your replica in every aspect to be compatible with you. In fact, such as exact match may be often counter-productive in marriage. People with complementary strengths and interests often make a more interesting couple. If one partner is river, other can be the shore; however, it is important to be a pillar of strength and support to each other.
There will be Challenges
Concern: I wish there are no conflicts between the two of us after marriage, and we live in perfect harmony; but I do not know how to ensure that.
तूफ़ान को आना है, आ कर चले जाना है
बादल है ये कुछ पल का, छा कर ढल जाना है
परछाईयाँ रह जाती, रह जाती निशानी है
ज़िंदगी और कुछ भी नहीं, तेरी मेरी कहानी है
Do not worry about conflicts, they are inevitable in marriage, but will pass on their own. Keep your focus on the bond of love between the two of you, and the occasional conflicts will be reduced to temporary storms in your life. Resolve not to take any tiff to heart.
There can be more questions in your mind, but you can answer them yourself by following the simple philosophy of this beautiful song:
एक प्यार का नगमा है, मौजों की रवानी है
ज़िंदगी और कुछ भी नहीं, तेरी मेरी कहानी है
You are no doubt on the verge of getting fed up with so much noise (shor) about marriage. You know that marriage is on the cards, but you do not want to rush into it. You want to be careful about this decision and find the perfect person before you take the plunge. You may also have many related concerns, like the following:
- Am I ready for marriage? How will I cope with the complexities and challenges of married life? Can I come up to the expectations from my spouse, family, and friends?
- This will be a big change for me. I will be losing my independent bachelor life and the freedom associated with it. Will I be happy?
- How do I look for a partner who is a perfect match for me? What if I discover later that the two of us are not compatible?
- I wish there are no conflicts between the two of us after marriage, and we live in perfect harmony; but I do not know how to ensure that.
If you got interested and are reading this post to find an answer, let us listen to this iconic song from the movie Shor together;
The meaningful words of this song may hold the key to your queries. Am I kidding? No, I am serious. This song tells you that it is not as complicated as you think, and mutual love can answer most of your concerns. Let me dissect it verse by verse to illustrate my point.
Relax. Take it Easy
Concern: Am I ready for marriage? How will I cope with the complexities and challenges of married life? Can I come up to the expectations from my spouse, family, and friends?
एक प्यार का नगमा है, मौजों की रवानी है
ज़िंदगी और कुछ भी नहीं, तेरी मेरी कहानी है
Life is a beautiful ode of love.. a flow of lovely waves.. It is only as complex as you decide to make it. Do not overburden yourself with the expectations imposed by others. It is your story, and the two of you choose what to write in it, simple.
Change is for Good
Concern: This will be a big change for me. I will be losing my independent bachelor life and the freedom associated with it. Will I be happy?
कुछ पाकर खोना है, कुछ खोकर पाना है
जीवन का मतलब तो आना और जाना है
दो पल के जीवन से, इक उम्र चुरानी है
ज़िंदगी और कुछ भी नहीं, तेरी मेरी कहानी है
Agreed, life changes after marriage and you lose your bachelor life, but look at the companionship that you get in return. A loving, caring and understanding partner for whole life. The joy that your kids give you, is something that is to be experienced; it cannot be described in words. So, the change that you undergo is for your own good.
The Perfect Couple
Concern: How do I look for a partner who is a perfect match for me? What if I discover later that the two of us are not compatible?
तू धार है नदिया की, मैं तेरा किनारा हूँ
तू मेरा सहारा है, मैं तेरा सहारा हूँ
आँखों में समंदर है, आशाओं का पानी है
ज़िंदगी और कुछ भी नहीं, तेरी मेरी कहानी है
It is not necessary that your partner must be your replica in every aspect to be compatible with you. In fact, such as exact match may be often counter-productive in marriage. People with complementary strengths and interests often make a more interesting couple. If one partner is river, other can be the shore; however, it is important to be a pillar of strength and support to each other.
There will be Challenges
Concern: I wish there are no conflicts between the two of us after marriage, and we live in perfect harmony; but I do not know how to ensure that.
तूफ़ान को आना है, आ कर चले जाना है
बादल है ये कुछ पल का, छा कर ढल जाना है
परछाईयाँ रह जाती, रह जाती निशानी है
ज़िंदगी और कुछ भी नहीं, तेरी मेरी कहानी है
Do not worry about conflicts, they are inevitable in marriage, but will pass on their own. Keep your focus on the bond of love between the two of you, and the occasional conflicts will be reduced to temporary storms in your life. Resolve not to take any tiff to heart.
There can be more questions in your mind, but you can answer them yourself by following the simple philosophy of this beautiful song:
एक प्यार का नगमा है, मौजों की रवानी है
ज़िंदगी और कुछ भी नहीं, तेरी मेरी कहानी है
Wah ,Sanjay ji very nicely described ....
ReplyDeleteThanks a lot Shubha ji.
ReplyDelete